• Home
  • Suggest A DIY
  • DIY Newsletter

Cross-Stitch

Charts, patterns and everything needlepoint

  • About CraftGossip
  • Our Network
    • Bath & Body Crafts
    • Candle Making Ideas
    • Crochet Ideas
    • Cross Stitch
    • Edible Crafts
    • Felting Patterns
    • Glass Art
    • Home & Garden Ideas
    • Indie Crafts
    • Jewelry Making
    • Kids Crafts
    • Knitting Patterns
    • Lesson Plans
    • Needlework
    • Party Ideas
    • Polymer Clay
    • Quilting Ideas
    • Recycled Crafts
    • Scrapbooking
    • Sewing Patterns
    • Card Making
    • DIY Weddings
    • Not Craft Ideas
  • Giveaways
  • Roundups
  • Store
  • Search

Funny Valentine’s Cross Stitch Patterns

January 8, 2026 by Sarah White

After writing about the same holidays for many years, it can be hard to find new things to share, so I love to come at holidays from different angles, which is what these funny Valentine’s day cross stitch patterns do. 

If you really don’t like other people that much, except for your one person, I have a couple of options for you. “You Suck the Least” from Steph X Stitch uses the classic conversation heart shape to deliver its snarky message. This one fits in a 6-inch hoop (that’s 15.24 cm) when worked on 14 count fabric, and I think it uses three colors. 

Take it ever further with “I Hate You the Least” from Grammy’s Cuss Stitch. This one is decorated with flowers and hearts and I think it also fits in a 6-inch hoop but the description is a little unclear. 

Get prehistoric with your Valentine greetings with this T-Rex love story from Aliton Embroidery. Using just two colors, it measures 62 by 54 stitches, or 4.4 by 3.9 inches/11.25 by 9.8 cm on 14 count fabric. It also only uses full cross stitches, so even if you’re a beginner you can make this one. 

If your love story transcends even death, stitch up this heartfelt skeleton valentine from Sassy Fox Cross Stitch. It uses three colors and measures 95 by 60 stitches. That comes out to 6.8 by 4.3 inches or 17.2 by 10.9 cm on 14 count fabric. If you’d like to make it smaller the product description includes sizing for other fabric counts as well. 

If you just can’t be bothered to get excited about Valentine’s Day, I bring you the meh conversation heart cross stitch pattern from Magic Maus Menagerie. This project uses 3 colors and comes out to 6.1 by 5.7 inches, or about 15.5 by 14.5 cm.

Do you make cross stitch projects for Valentine’s Day? I’d love to hear what you’re stitching up or if you make one of these snarky projects! 

«
»

Have you read?

Stitch Up Tons of Cute Patterns with The Pattern Club

I was recently approached by Alyssa, the cross stitcher behind the Etsy shop Stitchonomy, to take a look at her cross stitch pattern subscription club, known as The Pattern Club. 

I took a look around and there’s a lot of cute stuff and fun options you’ll want to check out, especially if you love themed patterns that are small, easy to stitch and fun to combine. 

The Pattern Club combines cross stitching with a social network. When you open the site you’ll see a news feed and have the ability to share updates much like you would on Facebook. You can see who is online, have buddies and post your own updates and photos. The community aspect is a little sparse right now but that should only grow. 

The stitch along hub is the place to find the most recent patterns and information on the current stitchalong. As of this writing the Book Lover’s stitchalong was happening, with little designs like Peter Rabbit, a skull for Hamlet and keys for Jane Eyre as well as authors including Arthur Conan Doyle, Charles Dickens and Jane Austen. 

Other pattern collections include European designs, Halloween, ocean life, an allotment garden and more. Alyssa tells me there’s a new theme every month that either she picks or members in the community suggest. You can stitch just the patterns you want or put them together to make a larger collage. 

The Stitchanomini vault gives you access to all of the previous patterns, and new patterns are released daily through the stitchalong. You can download individual patterns (most of them are 19 by 19 stitches) as PDFs or Pattern Keeper files. The PDFs include a color and black and white chart as well as a floss list. 

Another cool thing you can do is build your own pattern collages from all of the squares that have been released. The collage configurator allows you to add patterns of your choosing to a grid ranging from 2×2 patterns up to 4×4. You can scroll through all the current patterns or search by theme and size to make a project that suits your needs. (Above is an example I made kind of at random but you get the idea.)

If you want to check it out, you can grab a three-day free trial and see all the pattern options. Membership is $7.99 a month, or if you pay for a year at a time you’ll get two months free. In addition to the patterns in the club, members receive discounts on patterns and supplies purchased through the shop within the club. Annual members get access to three paid/retired stitchalongs and lifetime members receive all retired patterns. 

If you check it out I’d love to hear what you think!

 

Categories

Book Reviews Christmas Craft Businesses Craft Inspirations Craft News and Events Cross-Stitch Patterns & Charts Cross-Stitch Product Reviews Cross-Stitch Website Reviews Dogs & Cats Easter flowers Free Patterns Halloween More Cross Stitch Product Reviews spring Subversive Thanksgiving Tutorials and Patterns valentines day

RSS feed: More Articles More Articles

  • Learn about Vikings for Leif Erikson Day
  • This One Felting Trick Will Make Your Projects Look Instantly More Professional
  • How To Fix A Broken Beaded Necklace At Home
  • Everything You Need to Know About Moldable Plastic: How to Use Thermoplastic Pellets Safely
  • Hidden Storage Fake Books – Why You Need Them
  • 25 Crochet Halloween Cardigan Patterns and Spooky Sweater Ideas
  • Witch’s Cauldron Halloween Soap Recipe
  • 13 Halloween Ghost Handmade Card Ideas
  • Discover 10 Must-Read Books That Will Inspire Your Love for Sewing
  • Fun Halloween Cowls to Knit

Pick Your Blog

  • Sewing
  • Knitting
  • Quilting
  • Crochet
  • Home & Garden
  • Recycled Crafts
  • Scrapbooking
  • Card Making
  • Polymer Clay
  • Cross-Stitch
  • Edible Crafts
  • Felting
  • Glass Art
  • Indie Crafts
  • Kids Crafts
  • Jewelry Making
  • Lesson Plans
  • Needlework
  • Bath & Body
  • Party Ideas
  • Candle Making
  • DIY Weddings
  • Not Craft
  • Free Craft Projects

Copyright © 2026 · CraftGossip | Start Here | Contact Us | Link to Us | Your Editors | Privacy and affiliate policy