I am Not a Cat Cross Stitch Patterns

Cross-stitchers love a good meme, so it was only a matter of time before some stitchers turned the “I’m not a cat” lawyer into stitchable art.

Here are some patterns you can stitch up for your favorite lawyer/cat/meme aficionado, all from Etsy.

I’m not a cat from Lela Co Designs features the funny cat and the line “I’m not a cat.” The design is 75 by 58 stitches or about 5.4 by 4.1 inches stitched on 14 count fabric. It uses 20 colors.

AnnyFunnyXX adds the black square of a Zoom meeting around the cat’s face in their I am not a cat design. This one is 64 by 69 stitches, or 4.5 by 4.9 inches on 14 count fabric and uses 10 colors.

Stay Sane Stitchery has another take on the lawyer cat with a 4-color project. This one is 54 by 65 stitches, or 3.9 x 4.6 on 14 count.

Crafty Queer Designs take the lawyer cat to another cartoony level with a cat that’s dressed like a lawyer. So cute! This one is fit for an 8-inch hoop and uses backstitching to make the face rather than cross-stitching.

Include more of the famous line with this “I’m here live, I’m not a cat” design from Pink Baby Cabbage. It comes out to 4.93 x 3.79 inches and uses 8 colors.

Vet in Stitches includes the full line in their design as well, which is more words than cat but still fun. This one is 45 by 67 stitches and 4 colors. They also have another option that’s a little bigger (90 by 80) if you’re into that.

Or check out this one from perseverate, which looks like it would be pretty quick to stitch up with the simple line text and a small cat design. This one is 38 by 39 stitches so you can stitch it up to share on your next Zoom.

Zoom lawyer cat from the appropriately named Stitched Cat adds sweet green eyes with just a hint of the desperation you feel when you’re on a professional call with an unprofessional filter turned on. It uses 9 colors and is 68 by 70 stitches.

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Funny St. Patrick's Day Cross Stitch Patterns

If you like repeating cross stitch designs, borders you can use on other projects or as bookmarks, florals and Japanese-inspired designs, you’ll want to check out 200 Japanese Cross Stitch Designs by Saeko Endo. This collection of 200 cross stitch charts is low on instruction but big on inspiration for those who are comfortable taking a chart and running with it.

The book includes a brief introduction to the needed supplies and basics of stitching, but mostly is just photographs of finished designs and the charts that go with them. The charts vary widely in size and there can be anywhere from one to six charts printed on a single page.

Many of the designs are repeating patterns, but the chart shows a larger version so you can see how the repeats go together. Each chart has marked what portion is repeating and how many stitches and rows it includes. Other than that the charts are not numbered, but there are darker lines every five rows to help you count.

The patterns all range from one to three colors, and some include half cross stitches or back stitching, but most are full stitches.

The book is arranged into categories of motifs: geometric patterns, retro patterns, traditional Japanese patterns, floral and fauna and borders and pictorial motifs.

My favorites are the Japanese designs, many of which are recognizable from woodcuts, kimono designs and traditional shashiko embroidery. You’ll find cherry blossoms, suns, knots, and simple line designs that would be lots of fun to stitch.

There are a few pages devoted to different ways to modify charts such as changing colors, changing the way to design is repeated, flipping and rotating designs.

Other than that you’re on your own for how you actually want to use these designs. Of course they can just be stitched and framed but it might have been nice to see some of the projects stitched and staged in a way you might use them in everyday life (repeating motifs as coasters, or a bigger design turned into a pillow, for example).

Sometimes it helps to see designs used in different ways to get you thinking about how you might use them yourself. If you don’t need that creative push, this is a fine book full of patterns you’ll have fun playing with in different ways.

About the book: 112 pages, paperback, 200 patterns. Published 2025 by David & Charles. Suggested retail price $24.99.

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