Cross-Stitch

Charts, patterns and everything needlepoint

A Bitch in Time Offers Salty Cross-Stitch Patterns

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If you’re the sort of person to be turned off or offended by a cross-stitch book called A Bitch in Time, you should probably move on from this review right now.

It’s a book full of 30 snarky cross-stitch patterns (or as the subtitle puts it, sarcastic stitches for you to stab) by crafty sister-brother duo Tara K. Reed and Roy W.P. Reed.

The sayings are twisted, sometimes off-color statements, puns and plays on more familiar sentiments. You can stitch a neon sign to remind everyone of your passive aggressive personality, or a star-studded piece complete with stitched tiara that says “swearing is part of my charm.”

There are a few statements in this book I can’t reprint on a family website, but others are just funny (like “just fries no guys,” “he’s just one guy in the grand scheme of flings,” “I’m not off-kilter, I have no kilter” or “sarcasm is a condiment put it on everything” stitched in the colors of ketchup, mustard and pickle relish).

A gallery of the designs includes skill level, size of the design and the frame size used in the sample. Color charts and a list of floss colors are found at the back of the book. Tips on stitching, reading charts and materials are also found at the back of the book, which will be helpful for new stitchers or those who need a refresher.

If you’re a cross-stitcher with a snarky side and you don’t mind the occasional swear word or sex joke, this collection will provide a lot of laughs and some fun stitching for all your friends with dirty minds and sarcastic hearts.

About the book: 100 pages, paperback, 30 patterns. Retails for $29.99. Published by the Reed Studio. Buy online.

Looking for more Snarky or Subversive Cross stitch charts and designs? Check these out on Etsy. 

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Cheerful Sun Cross Stitch Patterns

As I write this, we’re on day three of an expected four days full of rain, so it’s no wonder I wanted to share some sunny cross stitch patterns.

This pretty sun from Anchor via Yarnspirations uses five different shades of cheery yellow. It measures 48 by 48 stitches, or 3.5 inches/8.5 cm square on 14 count fabric.

This smiling yellow sun is a great beginner cross stitch project. The design is from Bella Rose Craft and uses three colors. When worked on 14 count fabric it fits perfectly in a 4-inch hoop.

Add another color and you’ve got this sweet sun cross stitch pattern from Mamas Crafty Basket. It’s also a little larger, at 44 by 44 stitches, but it’s still a great choice for a new stitcher. That comes out to just over 3 inches/7.87 cm on 14 count fabric.

I love this cheerful sun from Sacred Thread Design because it looks like a fancied up version of something a child would draw. This one would be great for a nursery or child’s room, or anywhere that needs a ray of sunshine. It measures 99 by 95 stitches and uses 16 colors. On 14 count fabric it will come out to 7.1 by 6.8 inches, or 18 by 17.2 cm if that’s the way you measure.

If you like your sun with a side of moon, and maybe a planet, this set from Ma Galina Lativa may be what you’re looking for. It’s shown as two different hoops but you could stitch them on the same piece of fabric and frame them together if you’d rather. The sun by itself measures 67 by 66 stitches, while the moon is 52 by 40. 

And to finish up by taking it in a completely different direction, there’s this colorful folk art sun by Tiny House Studio BC. It got let into the party because the sun is smiling, but this is definitely not as easy a pattern as the others I’ve shared. This one uses a whopping 42 colors and is 140 by 175 stitches. That’s 10 by 12.5 inches, or 25.4 by 31.75 cm on 14 count fabric.