Book Review: Maybe Swearing Will Help

Snarky cross stitch — whether sweary or not — has been a big trend in recent years, and if this is not your style, scroll on by. I’m not sure I can review Maybe Swearing Will Help: Relax and Curse Your Ass Off in Cross Stitch without dropping some swears (especially since there’s one in the title!).

If you are the sort who likes your language a little salty, this book is so much fun. The 25 patterns in the book come from a range of designers and include a range of curses and swears. Some of them are merely snarky like the one that says “I wish I was a Unicorn so I could stab stupid people with my head” (designed by Aliton Embroidery) or Wash Your Damn Hands from Stitchy Little Fox.

A pop art style lady wonders “what the actual f**k” (of course the whole word is in the chart) in a design by Happy Sloth, while bold letters surrounded by flowers declare “Holy s**t I Love You” in a pattern from EZBakedCrafts. Grandma Girl Designs shares an elaborate piece with flowers and skulls that says “Oh Hell No,” while BeCoProductions’ design welcomes visitors to “the s**tshow.”

And of course there’s a stitched version of the classic meme about the barren field where you grow your f**ks. This one is also from EZBakedCrafts. Oh you can say f**k it in the style of a tattoo with a heart and birds, designed by Happy Sloth.

There are lots of other patterns that get a little more sweary, but I think you get the idea.

Patterns are presented with a full page, color photo of the stitched design, a page with the finished size and variations depending on the size fabric you use (14 count is recommended) and a color chart for the required threads. The charts are presented over two or more pages so they are easy to read. Stitching tips are included throughout, as well as a section covering the basics at the beginning of the book.

If you like your stitching with a side of swearing, or know someone with a sarcastic sense of humor who would enjoy the combination of cross stitch and cursing, you’re going to love this book.

About the book: 128 pages, paperback, 25 patterns. Published 2023 by Weldon Owen. Suggested retail $22.99.

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35+ Sunflower Cross Stitch Patterns

I love the look of variegated cross stitch floss and how it makes it possible to stitch with a variety of colors without changing thread, giving your project more depth and a more complex look without you having to do anything different.

Or at least not much different. I recently came across this blog post from The Copper Fox all about how to use variegated floss and it noted that many people would say it’s a good idea to complete a whole stitch (when you’re stitching whole cross stitches) with the floss before going on to the next stitch. Most of us stitch row by row, but of course if you do that with variegated yarn, it could change color along the way and you’ll end up with stitches that are half one color and half another color or a different shade.

Of course that makes total sense but I’d never thought about it.

The post includes swatches with different kinds of variegated threads to show the different between working stitch by stitch or row by row, and it doesn’t make a huge different over the small area shown but I can see how it might make a difference if you had really long rows or if you just want to make sure your stitches are a single color whenever possible.

In addition to this experiment, the post talks about other ways to work with multicolored floss, including deliberately mixing the colors among the strands of floss you are stitching with and stitching in a different order instead of right to left and top to bottom (or whatever direction you typically work) to get different effects from the thread.

It’s fun to geek out on this stuff because it can make a difference if you want to play with it, or you can just stitch on without giving it much thought, and both will give you good results.

Check out all the experiments at The Copper Fox.

Do you do anything different when you stitch with variegated floss? I’d love to hear about it!

[Photo: The Copper Fox]

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